Overwhelmed!

Well thanks for the response to my 1st post, I am overwhelmed by all your kind words and support.

I suppose that means I will now have to carry on writing now!! Thanks!

I am also sorry if I made you cry, obviously that was not my intention, I just want to raise awareness of an illness that passes so many of us by, I mean I have it and still do not fully understand it but in time I will.

I don't want this blog to be about preaching, more so just how I am going to manage this. I have had some challenges in my life, like the two years I spent in the army being one of the biggest but then along came this.........and I just wanted to share it with others, if I help other sufferers and help non-sufferers understand than that will be great.

I have joined an online forum which I found about 6-7 weeks ago and that has been fantastic, I have learnt so much from the people on there, they are so friendly and share the pain and suffering, it may sound strange to some people but knowing someone else is going through the same as yourself can be comforting too, as you don't feel alone and you know its "not all in your head".
In particular I have been chatting to someone and after only a couple of weeks I now regard as a friend...or I will say my " We will go camping together before we are 50" Friend......Now she will know who she is...!

I have always took for granted that I have my family and living so close to me and they will always be there, but no longer do I take this for granted and I know I am lucky. In fact I probably always took everything in my life for granted, going the pub, going on holiday, going to the shops and being quite spontaneous in my life. I raced through it at 110 mph without thinking about consequence, I always wanted to be centre of attention, playing the clown because I thought that was important, always trying to please others and giving people what the had come to expect from me. Maybe sometimes I was too much for people.......that's just me though.................I am not saying I regret all the things that I have done.............I actually loved it all, yes I made mistakes and hopefully I have learnt from them and if not I'm sure I will at some point.............A mistake is not a mistake if you don't learn from it. It just means that I now appreciate the time I go out more, being able to do "normal everyday things" instead of assuming I will and can do it.

On Sunday I went fishing for a few hours.........a hobby that my hubby is keen on and I started to participate in last year, even though my arms sometime hurt a lot that's I cannot fish, I just sit there in the open and enjoy the hours outside........Obviously wearing suncream at factor 50000 as I don't want sun burn on top of CFS too! I just find it so relaxing just sitting there watching the world go by and enjoying the fact that the passes by speak to you and not knowing that your ill............I can explain how great this feels........... :-)

I always thought about writing a diary but have never bothered too, but just in the last two days writing this has made me feel good about myself again and your words on encouragement will keep me going..................so thanks again..... ;-)