Improvement noted...and loving It........

Hello Again followers....How are we all?

What a great week it has been for me.....As you know from my last post things after the B12 injection had improved but that was just after 2 days......

Well Thursday came and I'll be honest I thought it hadn't worked as I felt POO.....however I did feel like it was just a cold bug that I had, so I tucked myself up in bed with some lemsip and rested up, trying not to let myself get down about it......and.........

Friday came and I felt fab again.......Phew it must have been a day of the sniffles and nothing more, I know its easy for both me and yourselves to say don't build your hopes up about the B12 injection but although I try and describe it as best I can here, you really don't understand how the last 10 months have effected and how I have felt.....it is hard not to get my hopes up, I know I shouldn't but after all I am only human (yes I am) and many of you would be the same.....

Anyhow Friday night and my 14 year old cousin Rudy was having his first competitive boxing match at a local club and at 5.30pm I decided I really wanted to go and support him, and he was fab, he lost on points but he was very courageous for a 14 year old in a room of about 500 or so watching, I was so proud of him and he will have many wins under his belt soon enough.....

I got through the night..(I say got through....) I enjoyed the night hugely, I had no ill effects and stayed out until 11.30pm and had a few shandies....YIKES!!! I really though on Saturday I was going to pay for this.....

Saturday morning came and after opening my eyes and waiting for my body for feel like a ton of bricks I was ok again!! I even went to town for 9am the feelings I had was the best I had experienced for a very long time, on Friday and Saturday a lot of folk commented how well I looked....and I felt NORMAL....(whatever normal is)

Saturday during the day I didn't really do much, some washing, but mainly pigged out as my real diet started on Monday so i was having a big blow out.....again!

Sunday was a great day too.....I prepared and cooked the dinner with the help of Ferg.....and of course my beloved Liverpool pulled out a stunning victory against Man Utd which just made me the happiest red in town........feeling great and putting one over the scum.......happy days........I even had a few bottles of Bud.....8 in fact but in the last few months when two were knocking me about...the 8 went down just fine......now I know I'm getting better.....

Today again has been a good day...I have flashed the bathroom liked you would believe......cleaned the ceiling tiles and wall tiles.......and did some other bits of housework.....okay so feeling good does have its downside...:-/

I hope this B12 lasts......I will be going back to the docs in 3 weeks for my next one as well as my 2nd Appt with the neurologist....I'm hoping the injections will continue in this vain for me.......for the first time in a long time I am looking forward to doing things again and even a return to work which I have missed....

I know it will all take time, my body has been dormant for 10 months, I need gentle exercise,a good diet to help rebuild me and also repair my confidence as that too was a little shot.....

So fingers crossed I maintain this.......I even walked to the shops the last few days on my own too.....which is a big things as although I've been out when I've been ill I have always been with someone...so this is a big step too.....

I have posted another holiday snap today.....these were the tasty crusty cobs from a lovely little bakery we found....even better with chips on....

Tale it easy peeps and I'll write again soon.....thanks for your well wished and support....Love LFB xxx

Holiday, Physio and Injection........!

Wow Guys.....Been a long time....sorry.......I must have been having fun...!

Well where do I start again......I know with the holiday........

It took us about 3 1/2 hours in the car to get to Mablethorpe, straight forward journey really and I was okay......We had a nice clean caravan allocated to us and even though it was rather chilly at night it was fine.......I actually did more than I ever thought I could and really chilled myself out and relaxed.....Usually when we have "English holidays" Hubby and I spend a vast amount of time in the pub and arcades....but on this trip because I didn't have the luxury of lots of energy we just strolled around, visited the shops and enjoyed the sea air......we walked along the beach each day stopping at little cafes for refuelling cups of tea every so often so I could rest to......

I felt alive again....we only went out the one night when England played to a little pub 2 mins walk from the caravan and then we were home by 10pm as I had consumed a few too many shandies.....but it was fun...

The 4 day break did me some good as it showed that even though I have CFS it doesn't mean i cannot enjoy life, I just need to go a little slower sometimes and I accept that, and I probably enjoyed this break alot more as I fully appreciated what I was able to do.

We are even planning a return trip for July next year regardless of my recovery, it was lovely and I would like to stroll on the beach in my summer clothes rather than a hoodie and woolly hat next time, and my photo's of the fantastic seal sanctuary didn't come out (bloody memory card!) so I need some more, and I must visit the fab bakery again too....:-)

So with the holiday over, I spent the majority of the weekend in bed as I was exhausted and physio and the injection where taking place on Monday.

The physio was ok again, much of the same really, I have been doing the exercises and we discussed that and I explained that I was feeling tired after doing it but at the same time I felt like my body was waking up too...so I am to carry on doing the exercises and return to him again in 3 weeks....I think its all about finding the right balance.....

Then we come to Monday afternoon and the B12 injection, oh my days, I have never been sop nervous in the build up to it, I think mainly excited/nervous but my palms were sweating, my stomach churning.....I got to the docs about 3:40pm and was called in almost immediately (which I was glad about) The injection was a red fluid (like ribena really) and a very small amount, not that I was expecting a huge amount, the jab was about 2 seconds long.....and off I went........

When I got home I felt fab and went for a run....( ha ha ha only kidding....wish that was true though!!!)

I just sat waiting all Monday night for the change to happen......and waited and waited....its not like say having a rash when you can see it clear up, and I felt quite tired, probably because I had worked myself up into such a state, so I went and had a hot relaxing bath and early night.....

Yesterday when I woke I felt groggy and it still took me the normal couple of hours to start functioning slightly, and I know the only way I would know if the B12 injection had worked was to test it........I did all the housework, made breakfast, lunch and tea and also some exercise.....I did start to feel slightly tired about 2.30pm but it passed quite quickly and it was only tiredness....I went to bed about 11pm last night still wondering if it had worked or was I just having a "Good Day"......

Today I woke up and felt quite bright quite soon after I had opened my eyes.....I made breakfast for me and hubby again.......and I have been to Asda too.....I do feel more bright and alert but a slight twinge of tiredness does creep in too.....that is probably expected too also considering what I have been through the last 10 months or so......

So am I cured?!?!? I don't know at this point.....I guess its still "Lets suck it and see"

Ferg says I seem much brighter and alert..............I go back for the 2nd jab in 4 weeks which also ties in to my next appt with the specialist.....it may be a case I need more B12 now to get my levels up and then have the injection more spaced out to maintain my levels.......

Its all still early stages but the signs are good......

As always I will keep you updated more regularly than I have done in the last few weeks...(if I'm not out having too much fun!)

Thanks for reading and also for your continued support and well wishes....

Today's picture is from my holiday last week......Seaside tea and a ginger biccy on the sea front..:-)


Take care see you soon....LFB xxx

Working Hard on Physio................

Hiya.......Well I havent left it a week again have I.....he he

So what have I done since we last met.....Sunday I relaxed alot, apart from watching my beloved Liverpool FC being beat by Chelsea, I was not amused.....I cant wait to get back to Anfield as soon as I feel better although the rate my boys are going I may not want to......but of course I will...:-)


So Monday came and I made my way in the afternoon to the physio, his name is Russell and quite a nice bloke, probably around my age maybe younger.....



He asked me what I could and couldn't do physically, how I get fatigued etc......I do not do much in the session other than talk to him and he gave me approx 10 exercises that I need to do at least 3-4 times a week, and also try some walking with a gradually increase of time I spend doing it....



I am to do the exercises at home and document briefly how I feel doing it and take that back to him on 19th October (the same day as my first B12 injection), not sure it that is wise but I will see how it goes......



I have done the exercise each day since Monday and finding them okay, and I finding muscles move I didn't know I had! I will continue to do them as its about keeping my body active and so so dormant as that will create muscle wastage....



I have been fatigued after doing them however after resting I feel OK......and although I am going away next week, I will still do them otherwise this week would have been pointless....



Had another chat with work today to discuss my progress and will go in for another health review at the end of the month, hopefully by then I will know if the B12 injection had helped, my boss has also asked me to the Xmas party which is nice considering I haven't been there most of the year, but what gave me a boost was when she said.."I'm still part of the team" Those words have given me some more hope of going back, although I am not naive enough to think I will just waltz back in and do my old job just like that, but I will cross that bridge when I need to and I am not worrying about that now.........I am happy that I am still officially employed, it does give my hope and feels like I haven't been abandoned on the scrap heap just yet.......I have said before and will say again, not many businesses would have treated me like this and I can only thank them for their support.....I say them but I actually mean Jayne my boss, and also some colleagues that read this and text me or say hi via facebook, all of that means alot to me so thanks guys....x




Anyhow I must start to pack my clothes for my little trip to the seaside.....why on earth I want to go the the seaside in October is beyond me.....no sun lotion being packed....extra thermal clothes I think......But oh the seaside fish and chips......TASTY...:-) and the sea air may do me some good.........




I will probably blog again before Monday and keep you updated on my progress.........



Today's photo was almost 2 years ago in Cuba.......Cant wait to return there


Keep Happy everyone........see you soon..................LFB......xxx

Feeling like poop....but possible cure???

OMG I know I left it a week again to blog but I have been a little unwell this week and not felt like doing much......

This week has been a slow one for me with a few down days as I wasn't able to get out much or even get on the wii fit again like last week, but I sat back and thought....I had a good run of things and its caught up with me so ride the wave, rest up and start again....

So that is what I have done, although today I feel rather sick and I have a blistering headache, I think there are a few nasty bugs going about and I probably picked one up somehow, so its Saturday afternoon and I'm resting in bed....

I have been the doctors this morning..yes a Saturday morning appt I was surprised too....my blood results for B12 were in and although the amount of B12 has increased slightly (thanks to the food and tablets no doubt) it is still low, so the result.......well The GP wanted to wait again to see how I carried on with the tablets I was taking (there is no prescription for better tablets and the food) and then review it again, I want so keen to keep waiting so he suggested I waited until I saw the consultant again next month again I said well they wanted me to speak with you.......I said to him can the symptoms I show be a cause from B12 deficiency and he said yes but it could also be a red herring..............

So the big questions would it harm me in anyway to try the B12 injections now.....No was the answer...but still he wasn't keen...so I usually just sit back and take that but I knew if I left the surgery at that point I would regret it....so I just said plain and simple I want the injection......please if there is no harm in having it lets try......and he agreed then.....I mean I have been ill since December, and my GP has been brilliant and explains everything and I really didn't want to get uppity or snotty with him and I didn't I just asked.....

I am having my first injection on 19th October....as I am away the week before and that is the soonest, I am looking forward to it in a way although I will say again I am not pinning my hopes on it although it is difficult not to sometimes....

The agreement is I will have one injection each month for 3 months see how that goes....well I cannot complain at that now......I hope this is the answer but if not that I will soldier on as before and work out how to live my life the comfortable way from there on.........

That's it really for this week........like i said I'm a little unwell at the minute and not up to writing much but I know a few people like to read this and its an easy way of keeping you updated.....

I hope you all have a fab weekend too.........

Today's picture is another wedding one from Cuba.......3 years ago on the 11th October.....WOAHHHH


See you soon......LFB xxx

Things are moving forward...........

Hello

I know its been nearly a week again, but I really don't want to bore you each day.......

So this week has flown by, its amazing how perception of time changes with the way you feel......when I'm having a bad day the days are so long and lonely yet when I feel good time flies....and on both days I could be doing the same.......hmmmmm

This week has been pretty much the same as last week although I feel I have done more with getting my body moving.....I did have a little off day on Wednesday, although I think I may have eaten some dodgy mushrooms as I was up in the night feeling very sick so I didn't sleep much either...so Wednesday was my day of rest...I was going to my mums's as my sisters and brothers go on a Wednesday and we have dinner but I just felt unwell so I was better off staying at home....

Thursday I was much brighter so it worked...I am slowly but surely listening to my bodies needs.........and I MUST continue to do this and go at MY pace that I am comfortable with.

I have this week been more careful with foods that I am eating and also trying to increase the B12 levels too, with a tablet and foods.......I had my bloods done yesterday so hopefully ion a week or so I will know more if its still low then who knows....I will keep you updated.....


I even had the Wii Fit out for 3 days this week doing some gradual exercises, I haven't felt too many ill effects although I was tired, so I will try every other day to do 15 minutes......and see if that helps.....

I start physio too on the 5th October for graded exercise, I am not sure what to expect but I sure will give it a damm good go.............! Its only down the road too which is good and my physio will be called Russell, I haven't met him yet but I'm sure we will get on just fine.....I am really looking forward to it as for the first time in a very long time I feel this could be it, although again I am going to be very careful as always as I know how bad a relapse can be....so its all about managing it, and not do what I want to do.....like the London Marathon!!! (as if)

So I hope you all have a good weekend, I plan on relaxing as next weekend its my Army reunion...so I need some energy for that and its only 2 weeks before my little holiday.......I can't wait to have seaside fish and chips......!


Today's pic is me and my special friend and hubby again...........this was taken a couple of weeks ago at Trenthams Monkey Forrest.......


Catch you all soon.......Love :FB xxxx

Just cant shake the tiredness off..............

Well Hello.............

I didn't realise it had been over a week since my last post...I must be busy......haha

Well I must say I feel like I am still improving and the headaches are getting less (touch wood) but I just cant seem to shake of the tiredness, I am still not sleeping in the day but I have had the occasional nap (20 mins or so) and this is only when the wave of fatigue is intense.......and normally I don't feel it build up it just BANG brick wall and its here..........

So I have had another appointment come through for the hospital to see the neurologist on the 19th November...the day after my 29th Birthday............no drinking for me then......I need a clear head......

I also had a letter come through with reference to my tests I have had, my lumbar puncture, EEG where fine most of my blood was fine but my ANA (something to do with anti-bodies are low) which may or may not be significant they will discuss and test further if need be at the hospital but its nothing to be overly concerned about for the minute and my B12 levels are low..........

So I am having on Thursday further bloods done to re-test my B12, I will give a brief description on this for you....B12 deficiency can cause some of the symptoms I have been experiencing although I am not pinning all my hopes on this...so I am trying to eat foods rich in B12 which is mainly animal products such as red meat, eggs, milk, marmite (good job I am a lover not a hater!) and I am taking a tablet supplement, it may be that my stomach cannot absorb the B12 so if this is not working and my level stays low, it may mean that I will have to have regular injections to help this, and then its a waiting game of whether this is what has been wrong with me or its plain and simple I have CFS.

In my last post I told you about the anti-depressants, that I was going to start taking, well I took the decision not to take them until I can get some resolve around this B12, like I said I am not pinning my hopes on this B12 but I feel if there is a slight chance then I do not want to take any tablets that may not be needed (if that makes sense) and I am seeing and other around me are seeing I am improving mentally and physically........although it is going to be a slow recovery and I must take my time in recovery to avoid any relapse like I suffered when I went back to work earlier on the year.

I am still trying to do some exercise each day until my physio appointment come through to get my body working again, and I am resting when my body starts to yell at me.........


I have booked my little mid week holiday at a Haven site in Mablethorpe, just outside Skegness so that should be fun, like I said I am just looking to relax in another environment as I doubt its going to be beach weather so just a few gentle strolls around locally will do me, and if hubby gets bored the park has its own fishing lake, something we both haven't done in about 6 weeks or so.

Well I promise next time not to leave my blog so long.............and I hope I can continue to improve...........

Thanks for reading and thanks for your messages of support.......

Today's photo is me and my nephew Louis........

See you all soon..............LFB xx

On the Mend???

WELL WELL WELL..............

Things are still looking well.............not 100% but 100% better than I have been..........

So I left you on sunday with the facts that I had been out for a while and felt different.....and here we are 5 days on and with a slight blip n Wednesday when I felt sorry for my own sad ass again and I still feel good.........

I went out for an hour or so on Monday to teh shops to get my Mum a birthday pressie for Tuesday, and then on Tuesday I went out for almost 2 hours and had lunch with my mum, 2 of my 3 sisters and 2 of my 5 nephews, and it was good....

I cannot remember the last time I did that, as in 3 days on the trot of going out, so it was aony an hour here and there but thats is alot for me if you have been reading this blog or speak to me often.

Dont get me wrong I have still had the headaches, but not always as intense and long lasting, and the fatigue is still present, but I am not wanting to sleep in the day like I did before, and I am sleeping through the night, a good 8-9 hours mostly.

I feel some of the old me is coming back to, where I want to go and do things, socilaise, shopping etc.....where as before looking back I was probably anxious to do those things because I was scared of being ill..........maybe I knew this but didnt admit it mainly to myself.

I have an appointment coem through to visit the neurologist too on the 19th November which is good, and I went to see my GP last night who suprised me with asking me if I wanted some more of some tablets.....the only tablets I take often are Omerprazole for acid reflux so when I questioned what tablets it turns out the neurologist has recomended I take amitriptyline which is an anti depressant............ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH was my 1st thought but the dose I take is to be 10mg going up to 50mg maximum if needed........so down the root of I dont want them etc etc........however if I was being treated for depression the dosage would be more like 100mg or so........

Anyhow some studies have shown the this tablet at this dosage each evening before bed can help with the pain ie Headaches I get so I have said before I will give anything a go, I will take them even though I have been reluctant before, I have spoken to others who suffer CFS and they have said that if helped them too with pain and sleep and just taking the edge of it..........and if I feel no benefit I can always stop taking them...........the downside is Alcohol is to avoided!! But being well again is more important.............

So I am going to start them tonight and I have to give it a couple of months I think as I may not see any benefits for a month, and if i react badly to them I will stop, but at least I know I have tried to help myself.


So today I have been to work for another review which went well, I feel more positive about things now (this is before the happy pills too!!) I do feel I will be able to work again and I have said before and will say it again.....Everyone at work who I have had some form of contact with over the 9 months have been fab, especially HR and my boss, they are very reassuring and also honest which helps, and in return I am honest with them about what I am doing etc......


I am also looking at booking a few days holiday for in about 4 weeks time, I feel I need to venture out of my bubble and get out of the falt too, I'm not planninga big adventure just a few quiet relaxing days in a caravan in Skegness.....again until I do things how will I know my limitations???


Last thing as I am aware this page is long.......When I got back from work I decided to start my own basic graded exercise by making use of Rowley Park which is at the back of my flat.......I went out on my own for the forst time in a long time, took a bottle of pop...and strolled around the park...taking a 25 minute chill on the benches watching the world go by and enjoying some sun......I went out for about an hour...walked for about 20 minutes......

I will continue to do this daily then gradually increase the amout of walking I do.............maybe this will help too......and if I feel that I cannot do it on my own I will wait and go in the evening with Ferg.......

So my legs are burning a bit now by the shock of that excercise so i am going to listen to some music and relax and loving the achievements I have done this week.........

Have a fab weekend all......I aim too............and we'll catch up next week.........

Todays picture is me and hubby agan in Mexico last October.......I think we were a tad tipsy in this picture...!


Love to all.......LFB....xx